The process of divorce is ugly. It can turn what was once love into hate and make you reconsider ever getting married again. Ideally, when pledging “for better or for worse” to your partner, you probably envisioned growing old together instead of being embroiled in a bitter battle over which piece of furniture belongs to whom.
As counterintuitive as it may be, divorce does not have to play out that way. Enter the amicable divorce. While those two words seem like they should never fit in the same phrase, there indeed is such a thing as a civil split. Knowing that a relationship can end on your terms is one reason many couples choose mediation over litigation.
Time and money
Going through traditional divorce litigation is a time-consuming affair. Quickly resolving the issue and moving forward is not part of the agenda when taking a case to court. It can take years to finalize a divorce which undoubtedly can be a significant drain on not only your schedule but your finances. Neither of these aspects takes into account the emotional toll going through litigation can have on your quality of life.
Divorce and depression
The surmounting bills, constant fighting and rulings that are not in your favor can make it seem like getting out of bed in the morning is pointless. Everything feels out of your control, and that can be paralyzing. When participating in a trial, being in the courtroom pits you and your soon-to-be ex against one another. Each person is put into a role, bad vs. good or winner vs. loser. In divorce cases like these, no one triumphs.
Utilizing the process of traditional divorce and position- based bargaining can end up dragging you in circles. A regular practice within an amicable divorce is using “interest-based bargaining.” Employing this method meets the interest of both parties and focuses on the desire to make this transition as peaceful as possible. Deciding on the way you want to split will ultimately determine how stressful, or not, the next phase of your life will be.