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Yes, it is possible to divorce without war

Many couples in the Libertyville area may feel like the words “divorce” and "health/amicable” are paradoxes or nonexistent. Though you may have heard a few stories about healthy separations, they are not as elusive as they might seem. Whether you are getting ready to separate, contemplating it or just curious, the efforts you put toward keeping things amicable during divorce between you and your partner can spare more than just your sanity in the long run. 

Many misconceptions can arise that keep you and your partner on different pages and your relationship out of balance. Also, if you and your partner cannot agree on things, you may feel like an amicable divorce is not within reach. Take some time to learn a few strategies to keep your divorce from becoming a war. 

Establish some ground rules 

There is no playbook for divorce. However, setting some boundaries and rules about the divorce process is important. Write them down so you and your partner have something to refer back to when things become challenging. It is crucial for you and spouse to remember that divorce is merely the end of an arrangement/contract, and you should treat it as strictly business for expediency. 

Stay positive 

You will feel many emotions about your situation. Some of those emotions may include anger, regret and frustration. If you are having a hard time keeping your feelings in check, they could affect your thinking and interfere with your ability to make practical decisions about issues that may require your input in the divorce. Consider seeing a divorce therapist and keeping a healthy social life. You should also get counseling for your children to prevent misunderstandings and to keep them from acting out. 

Let the law and facts dictate your actions 

No matter how much you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse decide to share with the courts, family and friends, the only ones who know for certain what transpired in your marriage are you and your ex-partner. You may feel tempted to badmouth them and share some personal and private details in an attempt to make them look bad. Doing so can backfire on you and cause you to appear vindictive to the judge and others. Bad and disrespectful behavior during divorce proceedings is common but risky. Avoid them by keeping track of your current and post-divorce goals and share nothing but the facts when necessary and abiding by the law.

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